Castle Walls ~ A Senryu Story

I generally think of Twitter as a way to kill time, err, keep up with friends and peers, but here recently it’s also become a sort of free for all for creative expression.  Here of late a few of us have been composing Senryū(a less strict form of haiku).

The first poem below came to me and shortly thereafter the very talented Raziel Moore (@_Monocle_ on Twitter) followed with one of his own.  Soon we were volleying back and forth and a story began to evolve.  We had no other communication it regards to this piece other than to compliment each other’s work, so the plot emerged spontaneously.  The red stanzas are mine, black his.  I do hope you enjoy.

Castle Walls

Dark thoughts tunneling

sappers at the walls, breaching

will she surrender?

Undermining her

seducing her from within

his words bear sweet fruit

A Trojan’s deceit

Welcomed, enveloped in her

beware bitter seeds.

The entry, conquest,

all is lost in the moment

heedless of the future.

In prudence she bows

Yielding is not surrender

Victory is hers.

Captured conqueror

In taking, he is taken

but does not feel loss

Ripe fruit devoured

bitter seed planted within

a careful attack

Something twisted, wrong.

New victories feel empty.

Something left behind?

Cold and windy spire.

Castellated widow’s walk

Hero ne’er returns?

Ragged, tested, spent

where did it all go so wrong?

Retracing his steps.

A kingdom awaits

sapped from within by his words

stronger than his steel

Familiar walls loom

breached, but impervious, now,

to compromised hearts?

Ice clad heart, warm flesh

Conquered, cast aside, locked out

Find the long lost key.

Two lessons hard learned:

Words – as swords – have two edges;

Forgotten seeds grow.

Thin, reedy, it’d bloom

for want of warmth and tending

Life beyond battle.

Broken sees broken.

Wanting sees wanting; wonders.

Despite… A way through?

Winter breaking, sun

seeking; finding her dreams,

once only moon-clad.

Iron and deceit

the old, too familiar tools;

he tries to reach past. Tries.

Rain chased, worn smooth path

Veined – Vined?- life coursing within

All leads to the heart.

Forging a new way

stepping through green, thorn heedless

strange territory.

A tainted dowry

Impure; Suitors disregard.

The seed planted grows.

Barrier of wounds

grown germs of his own sowing

arise with vengeance.

Veiled with life’s earned scars

Tender of bodies broken,

One familiar face?

The source, seed, and root

can demons born here be slain?

Choice now in her hands

Healer’s touch, binding

Drawn blood staining him; rampant

Her essence cleansing.

Buried truths burn free

as eyes and heart open clear

barbs, armor cast off

Anemones bloom

Lost is lost yet found and claimed

The seeds they will tend.




  1. This is wonderful, an excellent example of what can happen when two creative minds meet in an unrestrained environment. Bravo to you both – may there be more!

  2. What a cool project evolved–and what beautiful work resulted!

  3. very cool

  4. The lady colour of Dawn and the one eyed old goat. Who knew. Excellent work my friends.

  5. Thank you so much for posting this in its entirety! I was trying to follow this on my Blackberry from work and it was quite challenging, but reading it here, in full… brilliant, hot, and evocative.

    Very well done to both of you!

  6. Bravo…spontanaity rewarded!
    a beautiful story
    incomparable treasure!


  7. It was, as you well know, a great pleasure and a fun creative challenge, Scarlett. Thanks for the opportunity, and who know what the future will bring!


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